Girls vs. Boys

I don’t get girls. I don’t understand how their minds work. Yes, I know I am a girl (well, a woman; an old, old woman) but I am still, after nearly 44 years, baffled by how unpleasant they can be.

Some girls seem to feel that unless there is a drama going on life is boring. Some girls seem to think that it’s not fun to just get along and be nice to each other. Some girls seem to think that it’s OK to be bitchy and cause trouble between themselves and generally make life pretty unpleasant. Some girls play mind games, undermine  your confidence. I don’t understand this and never will. Sisterhood? Some girls have never heard of the word.

Most boys like to get along. And when they don’t they argue, they maybe fight, they get over it, they are friends again (or they are never friends again – they move on). Most boys have different friends for different activities. They don’t put all their eggs in one basket. They’re not exclusive with each other and they don’t care if their friend spends time with another friend and not them. They don’t try and cause trouble between their friends. They just want to have a good time. They laugh at each other, laugh at themselves and no-one gets upset. (Well, some boys can give it out and don’t like it when they get it back but they just get laughed at even more.)

Some girls are complicated, manipulative, possessive, jealous, insecure. They feed off others insecurities; they like to cause tension; they are only happy when something is “going on”.

Most boys are straightforward: feed them; let them sleep; let them let off steam and they’re pretty happy.

I don’t understand it and I find it so hard to explain to my girl why some girls are like this. She has been faithful, kind, open-hearted, trusting, forgiving. And still she is treated miserably.

In nearly 14 years, T has had one serious bust-up that lasted a matter of hours before hands were metaphorically shaken and a few angry texting sessions that were forgotten the next day. In just over 11 years, A has had countless upsets/break-ups/exclusions that have all lasted for days and sometimes weeks. How many times can she go through this before it has a real impact? Will she feel one day that she has to become someone different? Will she decide to stop trusting anyone in order to protect herself? I hope not. I hope I can help her see that it is not her; that it is not all girls – it can’t be can it? – it is just some girls.

Give me a group of smelly, noisy, daft boys any day. Spiteful, disloyal, fickle girls? No thanks.

 

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