I picked A up from school today as we had some errands to run in town and while I was waiting in the car for her (astounded at how atrocious the parking still is outside school – some things NEVER change) I received a text from her teacher advising that the class has watched the Sex Ed video this morning and they may have questions. I wasn’t too worried as A and I have had The Talk a while back. I didn’t want her to hear it from anyone else. Let’s face it, there’s ALWAYS a child in every class in every school that believes they know it all and can’t wait to enlighten those that don’t. I didn’t want A to get a skewed idea about “it” and wanted to make sure she knew I was able to discuss such matters without getting embarassed etc. (I hope I covered up my instinctively prudish side and didn’t make her feel awkward – I think I did OK). So, I decided in the few minutes between getting the text and her getting in the car that I wouldn’t mention it unless she did and then if she hadn’t brought it up or mentioned it in passing I would ask her later on in the evening, just to make sure she was OK with it all. But I expected not a peep from her about it if truth be told.
So, when her opening gambit when she got in the car (after “urgh this weather is horrible“) was “I nearly fainted today and had to go to sick bay” I didn’t relate it to The Video. She went on to say “I can’t believe they made us watch an actual baby coming out of an actual woman“. Horrified. No other words for it. Well, apart from disgusted, disturbed, shocked. Apparently, at the point when said baby was making an appearance she got a bit of a ringing in her ears and came over a bit hot and had to leave the room. A splash of water in the loos didn’t make any difference so she took herself off to sick bay. Lovely teachers fanned her and sorted her out with a book to take her mind off it (Chip, Biff and Kipper and not Biology for Beginners thankfully). She couldn’t eat her lunch until much later and, like me, nothing puts my girl off her food. It must have been bad.
Bless her. She then went on to say how awful the whole thing was. Mortifying, gruesome, just downright wrong. Children ready to run a race representing the sperm and a giant red yoga exercise ball at the end of the track representing the egg. The winning “sperm” launching themselves at the egg. She was scathing “couldn’t they have come up with a better idea than THAT?” And it went on. Children making a video at a family gathering asking relations and friends of family why they love each other and what love means – touching each other to make each other happy apparently (I remember this from watching The Video when T was in year 6 and imagining how kids would react to it). “As if anyone would do that in real life! Imagine me asking Nanny and Grandad or Uncle P and Auntie C!”Stupid cartoon drawings of penises and sperm with smiley faces. She kept asking “why? why would they make us watch it?“I think I can safely say that she is disgusted with the whole idea and she has announced that it has put her off having babies for life. I replied that if it had put her off having sex for life then that was all fine with me. I asked her if she had any questions. No, all perfectly clear thank you. No questions on the sex and baby thing. Just “why would they make us watch it?”
Oh dear. I had to try not to laugh at her little face all open mouthed and eyes wide in horror. I will remind her of this conversation when she is 16 and mooning around all loved up over some boy.